Thursday, October 31, 2013

Conversations with a stranger

So as most of you know, I have been working at my family's Thai Restaurant in Goodyear, AZ. I now have experience in shopping for, and serving in a Thai Restaurant.

As with anywhere in the Restaurant and service industry, I now have a very unique opportunity to meet people. I am sure there are plenty of behavioral studies done on behavior while eating out in a restaurant (especially dates, those are interesting to watch). Then of course the quote floating around Pinterest and FB: "A person who is nice to you but is not nice to the waiter, is not a nice person." Let's just say that even in my short time of working at the restaurant, I have stories to tell. Most of them good - nice, patient people who love the food. But then of course there are those who are impatient, rude, and unpleaseable. I have a few favorite regulars - if you come into our restaurant often enough, you get to know our life story, and vice versa. :) It's amazing how good food can bring people together.

I had a very interesting experience today at lunch time. There was a man who came in by himself. He ordered a Red Curry lunch special and asked for my help to connect to our Wi-Fi. I walked by a little while later to check on him and then we had a pretty lengthy conversation that was quite thought provoking.

After a minute or two, I found out that this man is a Convert to the church as of about 7 years, his wife is a member and goes regularly. He stopped going to church about 4 years ago, mainly in fact to the gross hypocrisy he saw in the men, especially those in leadership positions in his ward. He said many times over the course of our conversation and had lots of examples of their hypocrisy, dishonestly, and irreverence -in his ward in Utah and here in Arizona. On one hand, I can understand where he is coming from. I think we all have experiences with people who have little integrity, or are just plain hypocritical and pull the 'holier than thou', mote and beam bit. That can be frustrating for sure. On the other hand, I pitied him and the blessings he was denying himself and his family. Without me saying anything, he mentioned that 'he had heard it all, that the church is made of imperfect people, that the gospel is perfect, etc etc -I'm sure we've all heard a version of it. I do believe it's true though. We may be frustrated with the behavior of others, but ultimately we are responsible for our own salvation. I need to strive to lift others, but in the end I only have control over my own actions. He was a very honest man with lots of life experiences, and  yet he refuses to attend church seemingly just because of the behavior of others. He did say that whenever he hears someone talking bad about the church, he is the first to defend it - so we shall see what the future brings for him and his family. It was a very interesting conversation - one that I will ponder on for a while I'm still trying to wrap my brain around it.

We talked a lot about relationships, and in a round about way chastity. It was very interesting to hear his experiences with relationships, and infidelity and the like. He asked how long I had been married. He seemed pretty surprised when I told him I was single, being 26 and all- especially just moving here from Utah. He told me I'd find someone. He was shocked again to hear that I don't date much. It'll be nice when I find a job and am a little more settled, right now I am so busy with my family and finding a job, there isn't much time for boys...not that I'm beating any away with a stick by any means. He did say how important it is in a marriage that you are friends. Looks will fade, money may come and go, but if you are friends, you will always be friends. I like that. :)

One piece of advice he gave me was to grow some roots. He was pretty shocked with the number of places that I had lived. He talked a lot about the benefits of a long term relationship, with friends, family and neighbors, being able to be there for one another when things happen. I definitely see the value in that... however I treasure the friends and the experiences that I have all over the world. I have the travel bug, or a 'gypsy soul' as they say, I thrive on travelling around and exploring new places and experiencing new cultures and foods and everything else. So we shall see what the future brings for me. He did seem to think that I should marry a man in the military (I could definitely handle the moving around part.) but, then changed his mind and wanted me to settle in one place. So we'll see ;)

It is amazing the people that come into our lives, if even for a moment. It made me think of this:

Photographer Puts Two Strangers Together For Intimate Photographs, And The Results Are Surprising

I posted this Link on my FB page a few weeks ago, but saw it pop up again. It's nice when we have those experiences that take us out of our "Comfort Zones". We can learn so much from each other.

Apparently my marital status was quite the hot topic of conversation today as the ladies in the kitchen kept asking if I was going to move to Thailand - because then I could find a husband there. Oh mercy.

Thanks for reading the musings of a very single, 26 year old Mormon girl. Hope it gave you some food for thought.

Until next time,
-T


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